How fitting is this, Jay-Z’s 40th birthday is on my NYC song day. Hmmm, does Jay have any New York videos out right now? Ummm, yeah he does, i should know, I directed it. I kid, the is a Hype Williams joint and I love it. I can name about 97% of shots in this video. [RealTalk] I wonder if he’ll spend his 40 at 40/40. *Other Jay Posts*
Ths house on Garfield Place in Park Slope Brooklyn used to make me gag a little bit when I saw it. I don’t know what their intent was, but this is disgusting. It looks like bubblegum, I bet it devalued the adjacent properties. Who lives in there, Elle Woods, or something? I think she’s leasing it from Willy Wonka.
Yeah fine, M.I.A.’s Asian from England and Afrikan Boy’s from…well, you can guess that one. None of that matters, because that’s what it means to be a New Yorker, a Brooklynite- it’s a worldwide affair. Besides, the opening scene is of this video is the Brooklyn Bridge, you can’t get more New York than that.
I learned from my international homie, Fari B, that a “plane,” in India/ Central Asia, is a person that smokes a lot of weed all day (they call them “chimneys” in St. Kitts, right Jo.) They call’em Redman in Brick City.
That made the line click even more in my head, “I fly like paper, get high like planes/ If you catch me at the border, I got visas in my name.” That’s “Jigga Lyricism” right there. All Roads Lead To Bk.
I can name like 7 reasons why I love this song (+video) right now:
- The cash register sound reminds me of Pink Floyd’s “Money“
- The Cool Kids really do walk down the streets like that.
- Afrikan Boy, at the grill, is hilarious (listen to the remix with him and 50 Cent.)
- I didn’t need Pineapple Express or Wayne’s swagga to put me on to this one.
- Gun Shots in the chorus: So M.I.A.
- I can totally picture M.I.A. running up on someone, pistol-whipping them and stealing their rope chain.
- IT’S BROOKLYN!!
Sometimes when I’m riding on the train, I see some real aesthetically displeasing people. I’m taking a page from my mother’s book and not use that 4-letter U-word when describing people. As she would say, everyone’s beautiful to someone. I don’t know about all that, but the word ugly leaves no room for descretion, it’s so blunt, I’ll prefer “aesthetically displeasing” or “physically undesireable.” It really bugs me out when Flava Flav’s slightly older less attractive brother walks on the train and he’s wearing a wedding ring. That leaves me simultaneously optimistic and depressed. Apparently there’s someone for everyone, so why am I by myself. There’s also my theory that the Ms. Congeniality’s of the world know when to settle. Then there’s that enigma wrapped in a riddle known as Brooklyn, where Shabba Ranks bruh dates the Stacey Dash mami, go figure. That kind of Hitchcockian humor turns everything on it’s side. That probably explains why Dracula and UnPrecious over there keep looking at me, doing the schoolgirl giggle. I don’t know if one of them are trying to holla or if they’re clowning me, either way, I’m tapping out the ring. Some Brooklyn girls are rough and it’s always the ones that wanna make a scene on the train, too. I think to myself, “no boogies, no slobber, no crust on the sides of my mouth, what are they looking at?…are those moon eyes? Oh, the fear. Fall back Beowolf, you just released the AntiHorny.”
It’s rare to see Queen Amidala just walking the street in Park Slope without her Imperial Security Forces. She must have been heading to a tryst with long time lover, Jar Jar Binx again. Little does she know, the Darkside’s on her tail, her poly-vynil dreadlocks hold the key to rebuilding the Empire.