Home > He Must Be A Native, Manhattan > Time Square Tourists

Time Square Tourists

time square1“Oh wow, that’s where the New Year’s ball drops”
“Asshole you better move before I step all over you”
Yes the tall buildings are pretty and yeah that is MTV studios at 1515 Broadway, but this is a town on the move-SO MOVE! I can’t tell you how many times a pack of foreigners walking in front of me have abruptly stopped along the crosswalk, while the light’s flashing *walk*, just to take a pic of the skyline or something. I’m a New Yorker and “wait” is a four-letter word-the biggest curse word we know.  The information kiosks around Times Square need to come with walking directions: LOOK FORWARD, DON’T STOP MOVING. Its fun to speed walk through the crowd and watch all of the tourists freeze up like a deer in headlights, then mad-dash to the left  and right.  Even that doesn’t work in December though, holiday shoppers are the worst, the tourists and the natives. It takes like 20 minutes to get past Toys R Us, the ABCtime square2 Studio and the ESPN Store, and now that Bloomberg’s set up these Pedestrian Mall spaces in the street, I know it’s gonna be even worst this season. I can totally see the family of four from Iowa, sitting on those metal folding chairs, freezing their asses off,sipping on Starbucks in their I LOVE NY hats, shirts, scarves, gloves and fanny packs.

  1. Fariyal
    October 8, 2009 at 4:49 pm

    lmao! Hilarious!

  2. October 16, 2009 at 1:11 pm

    I know the first time I went to NYC as a NC country girl I was guilty of all of those major infractions. I was almost hit by a cab, heard “EXCUSE ME” about 33 times as people pushed by me, and almost got trapped on the subway because there were about 40 people getting on as we were getting off. All of this taught me one important thing…Speed is key in NY. From now on when I go I dont stop to sight-see, I walk VERY briskly, and I slip on my aggressive demeanor. Now…I get along fine in NY!

    • October 16, 2009 at 1:30 pm

      Thats whats up, sounds like youre already halfway to being mistaken for a native. Now just remember, shades on, shoulders back, chin up…and just watch the Time Square crowd just part for you..lol

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