The Burn List, a definition by c/A

BURN IT, SHRED IT, I DON’T CARE… That episode title from Damages season 2 always stuck in my head. If there were ever a way I could just wipe some things from people’s conciousness, I want to make sure my list is ready. Whether it’s a Pregnant Uggs-wearing Tea Party Ralleyer smoking a cigarette, toting a shotgun or the ubiquitous Mariachi band on the crowded subway during rush hour. Let’s not even get into the number of male enhancement/erectile dysfuction commercials we see on the tv nowadays, it’s the “tampon craze” of the 90s all over again (and how the hell is there an Extenze for women? If her clit turns into a dick, I’m killing myself). RYAN SEACREST SHAM-WOW COMMERCIALS JOHN GOSSELIN *whooosh* they all disappear.

Mockurazzi, a definition by c/A

I don’t care enough to stalk down New York City celebrities, just to get a blurry pic of their bodyguard’s palm. Save that for TMZ, I’m a native-we’re our own celebrities and we act like it. That’s why I find it so much more interesting capturing real people, there’s always a story there-somewhere. Sure, it’s a little voyeuristic, but every appearance in public is a presentation. If you want privacy in a city of 8 million, wear a burqa and take town cars. <left> *CHARLIE CHAPLIN, DRESSED AS A FIREFIGHTER, BUYS CONDOMS AND POPPERS AT A VILLAGE APOTHECARY* <right> *CRUELLA DA VILLE, IN PARK SLOPE JETS FOR THE PUPPY-MOBILE ON HER WAY TO THE WESTMINSTER KENNEL CLUB DOG SHOW (driver pictured)