Cool Subway Art: 28th Street Stairs On The Downtown N/R

Cool Subway Art: 28th Street Platform On The Downtown N/R

Today’s 6 Train Ride Was Brought To You, In Part, By Target, Please Watch Your Step As You Leave The Train.

Famous Last Words: This One Time, At Band Camp, I Was Drinking…

This one time, at band camp, I was drinking extra tall Long Island Iced Teas, alternating them with shots of Cuervo [*moment of silence*] Then I get on my drunk dial-drunk test game: “ohj yoiu linbe arounbg tjhge coiirtner? Ikll nbe thwere inm as miknute” … I leave my friends at the bar, I’m well passed tipping, but feeling ok, then I smoke a spliff on the way. [This is where I went wrong, take notes...] So I go to this chick’s house, she’s been drinking too, I’m like, FUCKYEAH, I just arrived at the corner of Buzzington & Easy St. We on the bed, AS SOON as we lean down to lay down, I’m like NOOOO! My brain wanted to throw up. Smoking, after a night of drinking feels like deep sea diving with no snorkel… So I go to the bathroom to put some water on my face, sober up, get focused, DirkDiggler-look-in-the-mirror style. None of this is working, I still see three of me in the mirror, so I turn off the light and go under the tub water and let the cold water run down my back. Now, I really can’t be sure of how long I was there for because I’m pretty sure I lost consciousness once, twice or thrice… All I know is that every time I came back to, I had one less article of clothing on. I thought, maybe, I’m good enough to get up now. NO. As soon as I take my head from the faucet, I feel like I just got off that dumbass amusement park ride that just spins and spins, The Starship 2000, or whatever it’s called. So I go back in the water. Then I hear banging on the door, this chick is frantic and slurring her words, something about my dad’s home and he’s pissed, you gotta go. *blank stare* Now, how fast do you really think I’ma go when I can’t even ATTEMPT to get the task that I did come here for done. [»»Cut to me in her room»»I really don't know how I got there, AT ALL]. This girl’s putting my clothes on for me (I’m totally not helping), she’s talking about my father’s gon’ kill you, you threw up in his house. I know that that’s completely false *looks down* for now. As soon as this chick starts to walk to her door, I get 3 feet and spew vomit, 40% alc. by volume, all over her wall and floor. 3 times. Then I just walk out, and start walking out of the building. I don’t know what ever happened to the clean up, I guess her dad was kinda mad, it didn’t phase me, I was already at the train station… But here’s the kicker, the girl leaves me a voicemail saying where’d you go, I wanted to give you $$ to get in a cab. I was thinking, if that were me, I’d be calling the curse you out, I don’t even like cleaning my own vomit. I just look back at that day and laugh..
For some reason, I could never call that chick again *shrugs* I guess I was embarrassed.

Finally We’re Catching Up To Other Metropolitan Cities That Have Had Timers For Decades

I Love This Shot

Asshole Of The Week Spotted On 27th Street And 7th Avenue At A Photoshoot [Blankest Stare Ever]

Hi, you’ve been to this blog (or, at least you’ve seen my twitpics), you know I like to take at least a one obscure interesting New York City pic a day. I was on an errand for my job, crossing the street, and I saw this scene. I like the way the red ”subway closed’ bulbs interact with the blue Chase signs. The green subway entrance is dynamic in the shot as well. The beige building isn’t even boring because the perspective the shot create, it almost looks like it’s more than a 90 degree angle.
You know how, when you’re about to take a shot, you notice someone would be in the frame, so you lower your camera from your face, as a gesture to say, “move, mofo.” So I did that, and this guy saw me do that. So when I raised the camera to my face again, I didn’t see him. Well, obviously he was there, but I was assuming he’d look away, turn his head or something. No, this GO idiot (he’s trying to be GQ, he just didn’t get there yet) actually poses for the pic. WTF! #wddda (where [they] do [that] at) WHO DOES THAT with another guy taking the picture? He deserves to be indicted on charges, felony, not misdemeoner.
I didn’t see this pic until I dumped the camera card on pc. I was livid, I’m only agitated and angry now. If you notice, this isn’t the picture, it’s a shot of the screen. That pic made my blood boil, it was erased. Now, today, I’m going to have to walk 8 blocks with my bosses digital camera just to rewrite history and correct past mistakes.

Coming Out Of The 33rd Street Subway Station, Looking Up At The Empire State Building

FROM THE BRONX: 233rd Street On The 2 Train, Looking West

Ever Wonder If You Can Piss And Run At The Same Time?

This is one of those mysteries that probably would have been on Mythbusters, but I cracked the code before the guy with the Colonel Sanders/Monopoly Man mustache got to it. I have this run I take in my neighborhood, well, the Greater East Central Bronx area- it’s far, like four or five miles. I break it down into about 9 laps, stopping for a block or two in between and then off again. So, I’m on my eighth lap, the last good run, where the ground is all even and it’s about a mile. A mile in this lonely industrial neighborhood where no one should be walking, or even stopping. Commerce Ave, you ever been? I keep it moving. It doesn’t matter if it’s day or night, the area has a Scooby Doo/Alice In Wonderland trippy vibe to it. Like I might have to fight the Jabawockee around the next turn. That’s my motivation to not stop.
The last time I went running, I was on Commerce and I could start to feel the bladder start to press. I was not trying to stop, I would have totally lost my momentum, I hate that. So I think, if a person’s thrusting their legs back and forth, can they release their bladder. POP EXPERIMENT time. I was wearing basketball shorts, so I didn’t even have to pull them down or anything, I was slick with it…like when a chick just pulls her panties to the side to have quick sex. When I first tried go, nothing happened. That was just trial one though, I wouldn’t give up that easily. I had to envision one inch ceramic bathroom tiles and porcelain stuff. The second time was the charm (I should have considered trajectory a little more carefully though). I don’t know why it wasn’t apparent to me that if I’m pissing and running at the same time, there’s a good chance I’ll pee on my leg, but never I mind, this was in the pursuit of science. Besides it was laundry day (by day, I mean, night) and what’s a little urine after 50 minutes of sweat, it probably just slid right off…or evaporated, I was hot.
This is a revolutionary scientific breakthrough for all citizen of earth. Any time someone’s running or jogging in deserted areas and they have to urinate, I can assure them there’s no need spoil their flow, just go. A new gadget will be created for the everyday Flo Jo’s out there – patent pending, of course.